When I was a single mum on benefits, long before it became trendy and eco-friendly to buy second hand clothes, you’d often find me (holding my breath because I really don’t like the dusty smell of charity shops) picking through the rails, looking to clothe my two young boys who seemed to grow like weeds.
This time of year was particularly tricky because it was school-uniform time, and they needed shoes, PE kits, stationary, lunchboxes…
I’d often get a small loan from my dad in August and pay him back a few quid a week just to be able to make that happen.
But, I was happy.
I focused on being the best mum I could with what I had at the time.
That world was in stark contrast to when I had a successful property business a few years later.
I loved the feeling of being able to buy the kids whatever they wanted.
However, I didn’t feel like it made me a better mum, though.
Letting go of the lavish lifestyle felt hard when the business failed and I went bankrupt in 2009.
I was back to square one again, financially.
And even though I felt momentarily guilty that I couldn’t buy the kids everything I used to buy them, it didn’t affect my relationship with them at all.
I’ve always known that whilst having money is good - it takes the pressure off and gives you more choices - what it doesn’t do is bring happiness in and of itself.
Happiness lies in the tiny moments of each day, regardless of what’s in your bank account.
It’s sharing a joke with the kids, it’s chatting with a friend, it’s enjoying the sunshine, hanging out with pets, encouraging children as they learn and grow, it’s watching a great film, the fun of learning something new, walking along a beach, it’s the pleasure you get from helping clients and colleagues at work.
I have found pleasure in exactly the same things all through the financial ups and downs of my life, and I’ve had a few! (said the actress to the bishop…).
Working with so many people over the years, I’ve seen the financial ups and downs of many people’s lives.
If you’re in a tricky financial position yourself, then it’s worth remembering the phrase, “What you focus on is what you feel”.
When you look for those little moments of happiness, they’ll always be there.
There’s also plenty of free help around, too, including our free e-book and audio Rock Solid Growth