Imagine you’d been diagnosed with an operable brain tumour, and you went to consult the surgeon and they turned up looking very flustered, and half way through your conversation with them they took a call from another patient who had concerns about their operation.
They spoke to that person for half an hour, then turned back to you saying, “Now where was I? Oh yeah - you’ve got a tumour in the left hemisphere. No! Wait! That last client was left. You’re right, right? My bad…”
It wouldn’t fill you with confidence, would it?
Especially, if they turned up on the day of your operation stinking of booze because they were stressed after a heavy few days at work.
It’s one of the examples I use with clients when I talk about how to position themselves with their clients.
If you’ve been brought up on the idea that you always have to bend over backwards to keep your clients happy and do everything they want you to do, then it’s possible that unless you only deal with one client for your entire career, then business will suffer if you don’t set boundaries with people.
I don’t mean you should compromise on the level of service you deliver, but simply things like you don’t have to answer their emails in five seconds flat or lick up their calls when you’re sitting on the bloody loo.
I have several clients who work with high net worth clients who spend hundreds of thousands of pounds, if not millions with them.
In that situation, it can be psychologically even harder to set boundaries because of the amount of investment the clients are making, and the way they’re probably used to having a lot of “Yes Sir, No Sir, Three Bags Full Sir” people around them.
Guilt and fear can take over because you want to look as if you’re doing a great job and you don’t want to lose their business.
But here’s the rub - and it’s applicable whether someone spends £1,0000 with you or £1,000,000:
If you don’t have boundaries, you won’t be able to serve them well.
End of story.
Boundaries involve things like setting expectations around when you are available to talk, and how quickly you are likely to respond to their queries.
They also involve financial matters such as not allowing yourself to be driven down on what you know your service is worth.
Guilt only exists where you can only see the negative for the clients when you set boundaries.
Here are the positives:
By conserving your mental focus through not responding to every single alert on your devices from them, you are more able to dedicate your brain power to provide a great service to them and your other clients.
By charging what you are worth, you are able to provide the best possible service and not be tempted to cut corners or spread yourself too thin with even more clients so you can earn what you need to earn.
By spreading your attention too thin, you are likely to become stressed, and your client will pick that up. They will feel like they’re in the hands of the scatty brain-surgeon.
Above everything, your clients want to feel as if they’ve made the right decision putting their trust in you. They want to feel confident. If you don’t look confident and assured in the way you deal with them (notice I’m not saying arrogant and aggressive!), they’ll be happy to wait a reasonable amount of time for responses from you, and pay you what you’re worth.
The positives for you when you set reasonable boundaries are as follows:
You protect your mental well being.
You protect your physical well being - stress-response hormones aren’t the sort of things you want coursing through your veins 24/7.
You protect your precious personal relationships (it’s much easier to find a new client than a new spouse!)
You can feel confident you’re serving all your clients equally well, not just the ones who are throwing tantrums. You don’t need to get emotionally triggered by everyone else’s urgency.
If this resonates with you, then please watch a great film called “The King’s Speech”.
It’s a masterclass in positioning, and will help you understand why you need to set boundaries with clients in order to earn their trust and respect and serve them well.
Happy boundary setting!